A New Favorite Cardio Machine

Hello all!  It has been a long day.  Work for some reason seemed to go on forever.  It just dragged on and on.  Traffic was awful on the way home, I think there was an accident on 405 south and so I was thankful for the exit for the gym.  For more then one reason.  First reason I was thankful was of course the traffic, AWFUL!  The second and really more important reason is I really wanted to go to the gym.  I was tired but I was so excited to kick my booty.  Test myself and see how far I can push myself. 

Well I found a new favorite machine for cardio.  The Arc Trainer.  I went so fast and hard on that machine that in half an hour I burned 517 calories, and traveled 1.65 miles.  I went so fast that the machine more then half the time kept telling me MAX SPEED and my heart rate got up as high as 170 BPM.  Beast mode was definitely enabled today.  No excuses, no "reasons".

I edited my workout play list and cut it down to 5 and put them on repeat.  They have a fast pace and a good beat and really get you in the I can't be stopped mood.  My list consists of "Bullet Proof" by La Roux, "Can't Be Tamed" by Miley Cyrus, "Roar" by Katy Perry, "Survivor" by Destiny's Child and lastly "You Gotta Want It" by Jordin Sparks.  Love it.  :)

I plugged in my ActiveLink and it only came in with 2 points burned off.  Which given my butt kicking was a little disappointing BUT it's ok.  It's definitely better then what I was doing and I'm sure it will help me weigh in less on Tuesday.  :)

Now it's time for bed, 6am comes way too quickly.  Good night all!

Meh...

Today I was a little naughty with my food, HOWEVER not too awful.  We had a potluck at work as a going away for my supervisor and there was meaty, spicy cheese, some pin wheels, some sandwiches, pumpkin cake, and of course chips and dip.  The key to today was that I had a little bit of everything, but a fairly small amount.  It did leave me full until the end of the day amazingly.

I did of course go to the gym.  I'm not going to lie, I almost didn't.  All these stupid excuses circled in my mind.  "My ankles hurt", "I'm so tired, I got awful sleep again last night", "I don't feel too good", "there are new shows premiering on TV today".  I shook off those stupid excuses and I went.  I decided; yeah my ankles hurt, but I can do a low impact workout and my tennis shoes will provide support.  Yeah, I am super tired tonight, but honestly, lately, when am I not tired?  I seem to always have a bad nights sleep, so I really can't use that as an excuse, if I did I would never workout.  Plus in theory the more I workout the more energy I will have.  Not feeling good isn't that critical either.  Usually I feel better after a workout and not doing a workout will make me feel worse due to the guilt.  And last but certainly not least, the TV shows.  That is such a lame excuse.  A couple hours of TV and relaxing on my butt doing nothing is not going to get me where I want to be and what I want to do.  Sitting around helped get me this fat, I can't allow TV to become a reason to be fat and not get what I want.

So I went to the gym, did the elliptical, did a more intense ab workout and only stopped when I thought I was going to throw up.  A good workout indeed.  Hooked up my ActiveLink to the computer to check my progress for the day, make sure I didn't need to run stairs and discovered I worked off 3 points today.  Yup, kicking butt, taking names.  Kinda proud of myself.  Feeling good, relatively.

Well it's bed time.  Time to rest up for tomorrow.  Good night all!  :)

Weigh In Time!

I forgot to post yesterday, however I did go to my Weight Watchers meeting and weighed in 4.8 lbs lighter!  My butt kicking clearly paid off!  :)  I was very excited about that.  Back on track and going strong.  

Today I'm off and hanging out with my friend who hurt her ankle.  But later on tonight I'm doing a self defense class.  What's really cool is it's free, AND a friend of mine is going to join me.  This ought to get my blood pumping I hope. I wasn't sure what the class would consist of but then I remembered the person that told me about it said I'd get to beat him up, so I think it will be a work out. Kinda excited about it. 

I also signed up for 3 martial arts classes to try that out. Always wanted to do martial arts.   I figured it will be helpful for the deputy sheriff position in a few months, hopefully in a few months.  :)

A Roller Coaster of a Day

Today was such a weird day!  I had my ups and I had my downs and I had my confusions. 

My day started out awesome!  On Wednesday I decided to measure my waist, hips, and bust, I think I posted a picture of that a couple days ago.  WELL today I re-measured myself and I was down one inch in the hips, one inch in the bust and one and a half inches in the waist!  In 3 days!  I was so ridiculous excited!  It made me believe that I can get down to a size medium in 3 months!

Then at work we were playing UNO between calls because it was pretty darn slow and a couple of friends took a picture of us playing and posted it on Facebook.  That was a bit of a wakeup call.  That was depressing.  That was frustrating.  (I'm the one in the blue print shirt, yeah no makeup today.)

 

The below picture shows how I drew myself in my Weight Watchers book exercise.  The drawing was to depict how I saw myself at the beginning of my journey.  I realize now, given the above pictures from today, how actually appropriate that picture is.  When I showed people that drawing they laughed and said "you don't look like that".  But I really do, it's not that far off.  It's a bad excuse but this is part of the reason why and how I got this way.  People always told me no, you aren't that big, you're not fat.  It really creates a false sense of comfort, it creates a false sense of comfort.  It creates denial.  Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying people should go around telling people they are fat, but don't tell people who are size 18/20 plus, yeah you are the perfect size.  I am currently a size 18/20, I am nowhere near the perfect size.  I am not healthy.  I have sleep apnea, high blood pressure and am constantly tired.  This is where "you are not big or you are not fat" and self denial has gotten me.  Sad but true.

I went from climbing the roller coaster, feeling excitement, feeling happy and those butterflies in my stomach, to a plummeting feeling of dread as the roller coaster shot down.  I felt scared and doubtful and worried.  All my self insecurities climbing to the top. 

After work I went to the gym and due to short weekend hours I had less then an hour to get in, change, work out and get out.  I used my time fairly well I thought.  Did half an hour on the treadmill and sweated up a storm.  Figured out where I'm at with my distance per minute and where I need to go.  The first picture is where I'm at now for distance per minute.  The next picture shows what I need to pump it up to.  UFTA!!!

 

 

When I got home though and plugged in my ActiveLink (which decided to work), that was another up moment in this roller coaster day.  I earned 2 points today with my exercise.  My goal per day is 1 point per day, so not too shabby.

Reflecting on this day has been mind blowing and I am ready for bed.  Good night all.  Sleep well.  :)

A Quick Thought

As I lay in bed tonight my brain is racing. Nothing really special, nothing really too important but it's not wanting to turn off.  

There's a chill in the air again tonight and I brought out my comforter to add to my fluffy blanket.  I love the feeling of a chill in the air and snuggling up with a blanket.  

Tonight I got in a pretty good workout.  Not exactly everything I wanted todo, but the gym closes early Fridays so I only had about an hour by the time I got down there after work.  I did kick my booty though.  I was driving home and felt something wet on my neck, I quickly realized it was my sweat from the workout.  Lol.  :)

At work we had a pizza and cupcake party for our training graduates.  That was hard.  I definitely went over my point allowance, but because I have been working hard I am ok with it.  :)  I indulged a bit.  

Fantastic news!  My ActiveLink decided to start working!  So excited!  For those not familiar with the ActiveLink, it's a fancy shmancy pedometer essentially.  It counts a wider range of movements and turns it into points.  What I love is that went you set it down with a little force it lights up to show your progress for the day.  It goes by 25%, up to 150%, today I maxed it out and went beyond! Over 160%!  Woot!  Love it.  

I am really looking forward to weighing in on Tuesday, getting back to my group of Weight Watchers people.  :) 

Tomorrow, willing I get off work on time I will be going to the gym of course.  I think I'm a bit addicted to the feeling.  I'm ok with it.  There are far worse things to be addicted to!  :)

I had to share this last tid bit as well.  I was looking through my new crockpots manual/cookbook.  It is funny the assembly instructions they put in there.  I mean I didn't think the first one was necessary, let alone the second one.  Check out this picture....

Scary right?!  What makes me sad is that there is probably a reason why they would put that in the manual.  Oh well.

Well ladies and gents, it is time to try to go to sleep again. 

Good night all!  :)

Butt Kicked

I think my body is trying to tell me something, I think that something is REST!  Lol!  :)  Today I set my alarm for 6 to do the video and once again I don't even remember it going off!  After work however I kicked my booty!  

I had a cup of water, at least 16 oz if not more and I drank the whole thing while I worked out, normally, even on my harder days I drink maybe half.  On my way out I had to buy a bottle of water because I was still thirsty.  

Felt so good though.  Every time I work out I love that feeling of being worn out and feeling accomplished.  When I was in college I would go to the school gym between classes during my 2 hour break and I lost a bunch of weight.  Went from a 16/18 to a 12 petites.  Then somewhere along the line I stopped going.  It's amazing how quickly you forget not only the good but bad things, the pain or the feeling of success.  

I think it's somewhere along the line of what women go through after they have a baby.  Now given, I do not say this from personal experience as I do not have children, HOWEVER, it seems that for most women child birth is very painful, a lot of them to my understanding say they will never do it again, and then a year or so later, they are craving another baby.  They have forgotten the pain it seems.  Now again, not from personal experience so if I'm wrong I apologize!  :)  Anyway, my point is, the same thing happens with the good.  I feel awesome after a workout but if I skip a week because I'm sick or whatever the case may be, it is so hard to get back into that mind set.  I forget how good I feel after a hard workout and think about the short term good feeling of sitting my booty on the couch and resting.

This my friends I will not allow to happen this time around.  My work is doing flu shots and you better believe I already signed myself up. With the nasty stuff going around my office lately I can't wait for that day to come!  I hate being sick(duh, who enjoys it right?) but I can't afford to be sick if I want to be a size medium by mid December.  No rest for this girl.  :)

Like I said on Facebook earlier today, beast mode activated.  Pumped and ready to go.  :)  Alright all, have to get to bed.  Sleep well!   :)

Good Re-Start

Ok, in all fairness I didn't wake up in time to do the video this morning.  I don't even remember the alarm going off!  However, I went to work of course and after work I went to the gym.  Kicked my butt!  Felt so good.  It's amazing how a week can make such a difference.  I left off being able to do 20 minutes on an elliptical without any issues, today I was able to do 10 minutes.  By the end of the week I will be back up to 20 at the very least.  

I have to admit, I took my measurements today and compared them with what size I want to be by my dirty 30.   To say it was daunting is an understatement.  It made me doubt myself and my ability to lose the weight I want to by 12/14.  But I know I can't let it get to me.  This is why I kicked my butt at the gym.  I have to prove to myself that I can do it.  

Dinner was so yummy today. I had only 4 points left for the day, so I had 12 mini wontons that I got at Costco.  At about a point per 4, it allowed me to stay within my limit.  I added some cherry tomatoes for a little more filling.  So delicious.  I love finding quick to make meals that are healthy.

Sadly my ActiveLink decided to go kaput.  Not sure why.  Some things on it work but not all, the most important part, the part that counts movements doesn't.  Sad day for me.  I'm going to have to call them and see if it's an easy fix or if I need a new one.  Lets hope for an easy fix.   

Now it's off to bed I go so that hopefully I can wake up in time to do the video.  Lets home for a restFULL not restLESS night.  Good night all!  :)

Slacking on the Posting

I want to apologize for slacking on the posting the last few days...week almost I should say.

It has been a bit of a roller coaster of a week.  Jury duty Monday through Friday, then work Saturday and Sunday.  My car tire has a nail in it and it has been going flat, but I didn't realize this until Friday night.  In the past if the sensor in my car turned on for my tire being low it would be fine by mid day, however this is not the case this week.

I feel like I'm being a bit of a whiner and giving buckets and buckets of excuses, I HATE that.  I HATE feeling like I'm just making excuses. 

Honestly though I have been SO tired.  Between court and work within the last three weeks I have had a total of 2.5 days off.  While no, I'm not doing any heavy lifting or strenuous work,  not having time to sleep in and rest takes a lot out of you, well it does out of me anyway.  I tried to go to sleep early during this time so that I could at least get be somewhat rested, but this is only part of the equation.  The other part is getting GOOD sleep, this does not include tossing and turning and turning my bed into a sheet less mess.  I have an app on my phone which you turn on and put it on your bed.  When you sleep it measures the mattresses movements, the deeper you sleep in theory, the less active your body is and therefore the less movement the app detects.  This is determined in percentages, in the last couple of weeks I have been getting between 48% and 76% sleep quality.  Not good...clearly.  I think this contributed to my nightly headaches.  Let me tell you, my liver is not liking me this week, 4 Excedrin Migraines a day just to get rid of a headache, yeeeaaaahhhhh......

I just came back from the Weight Watchers meeting.  It was hard and depressing.  I am back up by 4.2 lbs.  4.2 LBS!!!!  I HATE absolutely hate telling you this.  It's so hard for me to admit that I just let myself go so badly.  That I allowed myself to lose focus and lose track of my goal.  I needed those extra calories to keep going, but I could have used better calories.  Every decision this week contributed to that gain. 

Earlier this week I was driving...somewhere, I don't remember where at this point, and I drove by McDonald's and Jack in the Box and many other restaurants that I like and are quick and that I was craving, I drove by so many of them and as I'm driving by my resolve is weakening.  My brain is saying "no, you don't need or want that", but then as all this food keeps being shoved in my face as I drive by and I am tired, frustrated and sad it just took hold of me.  I went from thinking "no, you don't need or want that;" to "F this, I am too tired and sad to worry about it this week.  I need that."

Tomorrow starts my work week.  I FINALLY finished jury duty!  Today we delivered the verdict and I was home around 1.  Tomorrow I will be going back to work, so now it's back to a routine.  Supreme 90 day video in the morning before work Wednesday, Thursday and Friday and the gym on my way home.  Saturday I will do the gym and video after work as I start work early and honestly, I'm not going to get up at 4:30am to work out.  Sundays will be my off days, Between work and family time I just don't see it happening.  Mondays and Tuesdays are going to be tough, since I am off and the gym is about 30 miles from my house.  HOWEVER, I think the solution to this is to do the video at some point, not long after I get up probably and maybe run stairs in the house.  I'm still figuring this out, but I sure as heck will not have a gain again.  I can't afford it.

I was thinking about my birthday and I decided that there is a specific dress that I want to wear that day.  That dress is a size medium.  I am currently about an extra, extra large, the inch difference between the two sizes is 10 inches!  10!  UFTA!  But I think I can do it.  Will it be easy?  Clearly given the last few weeks, NO WAY!  But I will keep at it.  If I stop, that's when I will have failed.  I refuse.  There are two motivating factors, well 5, being healthy, not being the fat person in the group, the wedding next year, my birthday and the job.  The job is the thing that has really been driving me lately.

So that is my story this week.  Hard to face but at this point I can't go back in time and change it, so time to move forward.

Weigh In Day!

This week I kicked my booty, I ate well and it definitely paid off a bit!  I am down 2.4 lbs!  I'm going to be honest though, even though 2.4 lbs in one week is very good, I was hoping for closer to 5 lbs like the first week!  I kicked my booty, I ate well and I expected more.  HOWEVER!  I realize that I didn't put this weight on in 1 week and so I realize I'm not going to take it off in 1 week.  One day, one week, one month, one year at a time.  It's all small steps that lead to the big picture. I do realize however that as soon as my jury duty ends I need to get

on a much more rigid and hard core schedule.  Back to the videos in the morning and the gym after work.  No excuses. 

I found the actual requirements online for Washington State Law Enforcement fitness.  They were pretty much right on from what my friend had told me.  Now that this has been double confirmed I definitely know what to shoot for.  Plus the other day, I don't remember if I mentioned this already or not, I walked a half mile on a treadmill, took me 10 minutes! Unacceptable!  I need to cut it down by a 2/3!  That's going to take a minute.  

But it will be so worth it!  I was looking at pictures today to send my grandma on an SD card back to Poland. Let me tell you, it was so hard looking at this pictures.  Realizing that for the last about 20 years of my life I have been unhealthy and fat.  I don't have any pictures where I'm not the fatty in the group. My friends are thin and hot and there I am a big pile of human.  I remember the days that I took those pictures I felt good.  I thought I looked awesome, looking back at those pictures was hard.  It's almost as though my eyes have been opened.  Have I really been in denial this long?  It's scary to think that I deluded myself so much.  I realize now that the image I had in my head was not accurate.  My brain thought I was thin, but my body knew better.  It tried to tell me, it tried to warn me, but I didn't listen.  I am listening now.  I am paying attention and I am making conscious decisions.  It's no longer, "oh who will know if I don't tell anyone".  My body will know, and you all will know.  I plan on being honest and a bit brutal on this blog, about myself anyway.  :)

The Body

The body is a pretty amazing thing.  Last night I was so sore it hurt to turn the car. Today, while I was still sore I was able to drive just fine, lol.  :)  

I did go to the gym after work of course but it was a short and light work out.  By the time I got to the gym tonight there was only a half hour left before they closed.

I only had 5 points left for dinner because I decided to get a Subway in the morning and had a decent sized lunch.  I still managed to stay within my points for the day by having 2 eggs, a little bit of turkey deli meat cut up, some onion, mushrooms and rooster chili garlic sauce.  Pretty amazing dinner and very filling.  

Tomorrow I managed to get the day off!  Woot!  So I'm going to see about going to the gym down the street otherwise I will do some exercising at home.  :)  Definitely going to do some butt kicking tomorrow.  Excited to sleep in though.  :)

9/5/13

I kicked my butt at the gym and stayed within my WW points limit for the day. Pretty proud of myself.  :)  

How do you know you had a good workout? When you try to do weighted ab exercises and your body just says no and doesn't get up with the weights.  Another way, when turning the car? Your whole body hurts.  Yup, this is me tonight.   I am tired and about to go to bed.  Dinner was light, Cheerios and 2% milk and a peach.  Tomorrow I plan on going to the gym again.  Really excited about it.  My body is sore but I feel SO good.  Love this feeling.  I think I'm becoming addicted to it!  :)

Also, decided to keep that picture I put up earlier as a screen saver, always close at hand.  :)

A Scary Picture!

So a person on a WW Facebook group posted this picture and I find it very frightening.  I am not too far off from 250 and my my healthy weight would be around 120 so this really hits home. 

I knew about visceral fat but until I saw this picture it didn't really hit me.  

My poor organs!  My poor arteries and heart and lungs!  This makes me think of that movie Wall-E, a true horror movie.  

It's just another motivator.  Going to use this to fuel my fire.  Today after work I am off to the gym for sure. No excuses.  No backing down.  

A plus today though so far was I am down 2.4 lbs since August 16th.  Not a lot but glad that even with the gains I am still down.  Proves that my hard work isn't worthless.  It is making a difference. :)

Wednesday 9/4/13

Today was pretty awesome!  Went to court and I was super tired.  Eventually I had to take a Stay Awake pill to well... Stay Awake, lol.  :)  

During lunch I walked with a couple fellow juror ladies to Subway which is 0.3 of a mile away, down and then back up a steep hill, might I add I was wearing my fabulous blue "suede" knee high boots on about a 4 inch heal. Let me tell you, I did not think that Subway was that far away.  The way I choose to look at it though is at least I worked off some of that sandwich.  :)

After court I went to my friends house and we kicked our booties!  Not only did we do exercises on her elliptical but we also used her bench and weights.  

Slowly I have been increasing my time on the elliptical and today I did it again.  The increase proved a good idea.  Felt awesome.  We will see however how I feel tomorrow.  Lol.  :)  I started at being able to do only 5 minutes! Only about 2 weeks ago, now I'm up to 20 minutes!  Pretty excited about this.  :)

After the work out my friend fed me, she's an AMAZING cook!  This mind you can be a double edged sword. The better it is the more I want to eat, however I get an amazing and healthy meal.  Today she made rice, with shredded pork, salad and mango and avocado salsa to go on top of the pork.  13 points plus points for dinner.  Could have been more but I didn't put dressing on my salad(I know I'm kinda weird.)  :)

Bottom line - today was a great day.  Tomorrow it's the gym after work.  Woot!

A Small Hurdle Passed

Today on my way home from the WW meeting I was again having a bit of a self pity party about having gained weight.  There are at least 10 junk food restaurants between WW and my house, keep in mind that's not even counting Papa Murphy's and Teriyaki places or the Baskin Robins, Starbucks and all of the Subways.  Now you may be thinking Subways?  Subways isn't a junk food place, and if you can control yourself around them, then you are right, they are definitely a healthy option; however; as I confessed recently, I am a Subway addict and I can't have just half a sandwich.  Tried buying half, can't even manage that!  

Anyway getting back to my point, sorry I tend to blabber on at times. Lol.  :)

Anyway, I was driving home, with these many delicious options within a 4.3 mile distance and I had all intentions of allowing my pity party to take over and getting that Ultimate Cheeseburger from Jack in the Box.  But I thought of this blog and I thought of that job and I thought about that burger.  Would it taste good?  Yeah for the next few minutes while I devour it(I don't just eat those suckers, I DEVOUR!)  What it came down to though was that these few minutes were not worth the extra lbs that I had put on doing just that, throwing myself pity parties and buying the food to go along with it.  So I kept driving, I drove past that Taco Time, Jack in the Box, McDonald's, Wendy's and many, many more places all the way home.  

At home I took the left overs from last nights beef and veggies and I cut up the beef, cut up some extra mushrooms and made myself some scrambled eggs with beef, mushrooms and salsa.  It was fabulous!  Everything in it I would say it was about 12 points plus.  Let me tell you, so filling, it was well worth the points.  :)  Especially since I had them to spend.  :)

Rough Start

Today I went to weigh in and am sad to report that I was up 1.2 lbs.  In all honesty I did borderline expect it. Yes, I worked out(but only twice), yes, I danced some calories off (but let's be honest it wasn't that much.)

I tried to go to the sport complex after court but found out that they don't have a track field.  Boooo!  I did ask my WW group on Facebook if anyone knew of a track field in my area and was pointed to one.   So tomorrow I'm going to call them, their website didn't have much info, and find out when they are open to the public.  

Tomorrow after court I am going over to my friends house and we are going to use her weights, her elliptical, my work out ball and tension band.  Going to be a good work out.  Thursday, Friday and Saturday I'm going to the gym after work.  

Did laundry so all my workout clothes are clean.  Packing a gym bag with a weeks worth of clothes and gym shoes, putting it in my trunk, this way I don't have the excuse "I forgot my gym clothes".  

Tuesday, after Labor Day

Yesterday was Labor Day and so there was no court.  Today we are back in session.  I brought a change of clothes, work out pants, shirt and of course tennis shoes.  The plan is to go down to the sport complex by my house and try to run the mile, she how long it will take me.  I did a mile as you know in 11 minutes on the elliptical but I just don't think it's the same.  So today is the first attempt.  We will see how much I have to improve.  :)

9/2/13

Today, due to yesterday's fun times, I was much better about eating and dinner tonight consisted of some meat and veggies.  And half the day I spent organizing and doing laundry and ironing.  I put it off as long as I could but it has to be done.  Lol.  :)  The first half of the day was spent sleeping.  :)

Yesterday - 9/1/13

Yesterday, was a great day!  I went to work but only had a half day and then went to my friends house warming party. That was a day I had accepted that good decisions will not be made.  The alcohol and the food probably made for a weeks worth of points.  It was worth it though.  :)  The food was amazing and so were the drinks. Plus I worked off some calories with some dancing.  :)

Great Night

I have had a great night tonight but at what expense?  I had 2 - 24 oz beers and more then a couple BBQ chicken legs, some pork, some watermelon, chips, dip and a couple other things that in this condition I do not currently remember.  Thank God for auto correct!  Lol!  Never thought I'd say that.  

Anyway it was a good night and I have to admit even if I did go over my points for today it was worth it. The food was amazing and so was the company. 

Last night I did look up the proper form for a sit up and a push up.  I don't want to give them a reason to fail me.

I also downloaded an app that measures your laps and how long they were and so forth. Pretty excited about this.  I hope it helps.  :)